Let’s laugh at Derby – already!

The would-be amateur porn star vents his frustration at missing out on a bit of nookie with a ropey bird..

The would-be amateur porn star vents his frustration at missing out on a bit of nookie with a ropey bird..

It’s true that he who laughs last laughs longest, well, perhaps it is – and since we’ve yet to play, against strong opponents, on dreaded Sky, perhaps it’s ill-conceived conceit to be laughing at Derby.  But I can’t help it.

When the fixtures were announced, Paul Jewell must have felt both chuffed as hell, and nervous, to draw the playoff winners Doncaster Rovers at home to start the season.  Surely his reassembled Derby team would be able to see off these new arrivals and herald his first league win as manager of the Rams?  Well, I’m afraid you’ll have to keep waiting, Paul – because thanks to Lewis Guy, Donny have gone to Pride Park and claimed a one nil scalp to start the season.

 

Reading lessons for a Derby youngster..

Reading lessons for a Derby youngster..

And that can give us hope, as we too await a showdown with a recently-relegated-from-the-Prem variant of team – not that Reading are the same prospect that Derby are; but even so, it’s reassuring.  Reading through the Derby Evening Telegraph live text commentary briefly (which felt suitably dirty), it appears that Commons had a good game (come on, like it or not, you’re interested!), but his teammates were somewhat less impressive – if he carries on his one game on, five games off levels of consistency of his Forest days, then they could be in the shit!

Commons treats his teammates to an alluring whiff of his pre-match meal...

Commons treats his teammates to an alluring whiff of his pre-match meal...

Amongst the last comments on the match feed is this little gem, “Any positives at all – other than Commons?” asked a Derby fan called Vim.  After a minute’s pause, the typed response was worth waiting for… “Honestly? Not really.  Albrechtsen and Stubbs looked good.  It will be interesting to find out what happened to Stubbs.”  I make no pretense that now we’re in the same league, I show quite a big amount of interest in how the Sheep are getting on; and today made happy reading for the start of Paul Jewell’s latest attempt to build a team of note at Pride Park!

The other nice thing the DET provided was some amusing pictures for me to play with, on opening day – a magical day, even more magical when Derby have picked up where they left off last season and – well, continued to live up to their ‘Derby Nil’ moniker.  Anyone fancy laying a bet that Paul Jewell will last ’til Christmas (I mean in his job, not getting caught on camera with a dodgy slapper!)… thought not!  Well done Doncaster, just like the last day of last season, the first day of this sees Nottingham raising a glass to your results!

Although of course tomorrow the laughter might well be coming back upon us from t’other end of the A52, I shall grant the final word to the football genius that is Paul Jewell…

The wisdom of Paul Jewell, as he ponders yet another dour defeat for his hapless Derby side

The wisdom of Paul Jewell, as he ponders yet another dour defeat for his hapless Derby side

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